Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Few Little Words

How do you sum up yourself in just a few words? Lately, I've struggled with this a lot. It seems like I've had to write a quick blurb of my life in barely over 140 characters.

Boy mom. Twin Mom. Girlfriend. Work in radio. Can't cook. Hates to clean. Wishes she were good at photography. Loves to plan parties. Loves to use Photoshop.

It seems like I'm looking at myself through someone else's window.

I'm at a complete turning point in my life, one filled with uncertainty and trying to figure out even more who I am. I'm not sure where this is coming from, maybe it's 'cause I'm turning 30 in just over a month, but I feel like I'm trying to find myself all over again.

Didn't I do this in my twenties?

One thing I know for sure is,

these three rock my world!

I love B, but I loooove my babies. I'd be lying if I wasn't just a tiny bit pleased that Peanut wanted no one but me this morning, even though it broke my heart to watch him cry for me at the window.

I'd be lying if I'm not secretly happy that Bug runs around saying, "Mommy, mommy, mommy," and it makes me even happier that he now calls B "Mommy" more often than not. Now, he can wipe the smirk off his face that he's been wearing since they started saying "Da Da," months before "Ma Ma." And the fact that they can say both but choose to call him, "Mommy?" Tickles me.

Almost two years into this adventure, (two years!) I can say that I barely remember my life before them, I feel like they've always been a part of me, a part of us, and I know we were meant to be a family. At the end of the day, if I need to label myself as something, I'm happy to be known as their mama and B's girlfriend.




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5 comments:

  1. I know the feeling, girl. I went through this around my 30th birthday a few months ago too. But from what I hear, the 30's are the best. So far it's been pretty good to me! :)

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  2. Ditto!! I found a lot of things STARTED when I turned 30. I wasn't a mama yet, but in a big way, my life was just beginning. But the 29-year-old me was thinking it was all about to end!!

    It's a good opportunity to reflect and enjoy the beautiful world you have created! :)

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  3. Lindsay your family is so cute and you should be proud that two adorable little guys call you mommy :) And as for life I feel like many people feel lost at many points in life but I feel like thats why we feel so blessed in those moments when we know we are exactly where we are suppose to be.

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  4. They're so precious and with B in the middle in that pic, they look like triplets. ha. It's so hard to think of ourselves as something . . . outside of ourselves. And there are so many dimensions to each of us: how do we use which ones to use to describe ourselves? I certainly don't have any answers.

    30 sounds way scarier than it is. ;)

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  5. I went through something similar when I turned 30, but at that time, I still didn't have kids. When I had the twins at 34, I can tell you I went through a major identity crisis...All my life, I had defined myself through the lens of my job. Then these two little beings rocked my world and left me wondering who/what/when...Now, two and a half years later, I finally feel like I am starting to redefine myself again. I am a mom and ____. It's a work in progress!

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