Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Who's Your Audience?

I've always been a writer. It's like therapy for me. Throughout my teen years, I often resorted to writing to get my feelings out, sometimes I'd even write my boyfriends letters to help settle an argument because it's so much easier to put it on paper, have them read it and then talk about it.

Ever since the first Mini Threads  was a bust, I really started to think, who am I writing for? What began as a blog for me to chronicle decorating my first apartment an all the other fun things I do, quickly turned into a mish-mash of my life, things that make me laugh, fun things I do with B then turned into a mommy blog.

But I'm not very open. I wish I was. I wish I had the confidence to hit publish without worrying about hurting others feelings, without wondering if I offended someone.

The thing holding me back is....my family. Believe it or not, the people that are supposed to love you unconditionally are the ones I'm hiding things from. Are they going to judge me because I've gone back to B two different times and then stood by his side while we went through another rough patch? Are they going to be upset that I said I wanted an empty hospital room for about 10 minutes after I had the Bambinos? Are they going to judge me for working concerts or doing fun things with B instead of being with my kids? Are they going to judge me for spending money on myself instead of the Bambinos? Are they offended I'm even writing this post? I have no idea if my family is actually judging me, but I fear that they will based on what I write, just as I fear I will offend them with what I write.

Blogging has been fuel to arguments between my mom and me, and even some other family members, but then yesterday I read this article and realized, this is my life, my story, my book. None of what I put on here is ever the full story, I can never account for every detail so if I'm worried about people judging me because of what I put on here, I'm probably worried for no reason. This is supposed to be a record of my life, my thoughts, my dreams, and the crazy antics of my life with  a man-child and twin boys.

It's going to be a slow, uphill climb, but I'm going to try my darndest to get back to writing for me and for no one else. I will probably never put it all out there like a lot of my other favorite bloggers, but I'm going to blog what I think is important and try not to worry what everyone else thinks.

Please don't judge me?

And, just because I can:
Yes, they were still in their jammies at 2pm, we're not judging, remember?




 
The link up is tomorrow! I hope you'll join me

12 comments:

  1. It's tough because everyone wants to give their opinion and of course they all think THEY are right.

    I've had my blog for over 4 years and kept it from my family. Not because I am ashamed of anything I post, but because I want it to be for me, not my family.

    As long as you love your family and they love you - nothing anyone says matters!

    Your boys are SO cute!

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  2. Thank you. As far as i know, my family hasn't judged me based on what I write, but I still fear it will happen.

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  3. great post love. at the end of the day, you write for you, and only you. couldn't agree more :)

    love the kiddos! so handsome

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  4. They are too cute! and dont feel bad......sometimes my kids are in pjs all day too ..who cares ! I know what you mean about holding back though ....I mean I know my mom wont judge me but sometimes I hold back writing anything to racy about me and Mr. V cuz I think she might not wanna think about that ...LOL.

    Also as far as doing a link up ....I think it definitely takes time to lure people in ...just be consistent writing .....I know i try to tell my self to write more like I talk in real life and be the same person that makes everyone laugh face to face. People like to see the real you so just keep at it and people will join eventually ....or maybe hold off a bit on the link up until you know you have a bigger audience :)

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  5. BTW i know it shallow but the best advice I can give you is post tons of pics ! Im soooooooooo guilty of not doing this but people like to look at pics and sometimes you could write the best post and people wont even read without pics .....sad but true

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    Replies
    1. I write just like I talk and usually post a bunch of pics. I think I have a good balance (except on this post.) I hate to admit but my kids don't change out of pjs most days. I leave right around breakfast, they're with my mom and then their dad comes home and doesn't change them into clothes unless they go somewhere. I'm not that concerned about it, except when I try and find cute pics of them in their actual clothes.

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    2. LOL i know the feeling ...I think all the cute pics i have are mostly tub pics since thats the only place they sit still ! But i just got a new camera lens that will finally autofocus with my camera so Im hoping to get some nice shots of them playing now :)

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  6. You say you are not honest yet this is a totally honest post! I think as bloggers we all feel this way sometimes! Cheers to you and your boys are just to die for!!

    p.s. My name is Laurel and I just discovered your blog through the Bloggy Boot Camp Day! My blog is www.girlmeetsworld2011.blogspot.com

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  7. I love that pic of E & E (and all pics of them). They are absolutely darling, and they look just as cute in their jammies as they do in "real" clothes.

    It's hard to strike that balance you're talking about. I'm not very open about a lot of things on my blog, either, since it's just too public! I never know who is reading it (that I know in real life), and I'm just not comfortable writing about some of the deeper, more personal stuff when random uncles of mine could be reading, haha. However, as you know, I'll lay it all out there via email/phone/in person to friends. I think you do a great job, but I'm glad you're deciding not to worry about what people thing. Your blog is one of my very favorites and I'm glad we found each other!

    As far as promoting your link up, I think you're in pretty good shape since you seem to know a lot of mommy bloggers. I think reaching out to mommy bloggers is the best bet, since the linkup is most relevant to them.

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  8. I wish I have never told my family about my blog. I hear you. Keep writing, I love it. Start a private blog if you need to and write just for you.

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  9. I read the article you linked and really loved all the advice on there!

    It's sad that your family is judging you (whether it's your decisions, what you write about, etc.) They should be there to support you 100%.

    My experience with the blog world is that you are not likely to get judged for being honest and transparent. In fact, most of the women on here will be the first to lend you support or a kind word. I wrote a post the other day that was highly political and controversial....and you know what? I got so many *meaningful* comments because of it. People can tell when you're writing from the heart, and that's what they will respond to.

    Love ya girl!

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  10. I get where you are coming from 100%. For me, it is about just making myself vulnerable, from many stand points. But, know I support you and NEVER judge. But you already KNOW this. You know secrets about me that my closest irl friends don't even know, lol. I heart you girl. Keep your head up and JUST DO YOU!!!! I know I will love you anyway....

    p.s. I love pj days....oh yes!!!! And super cute pjs at that!!! They are so a-dorable.

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I'd love to hear what you have to say, I always ALWAYS write back so please make sure you have an email attached to your profile :)

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