I'm envious of stay at home moms. I know it's hard, their days are probably much harder than mine because for 6-7 hours a day, someone else is at home watching my kids. I get to get out of the house and have adult interaction. I get to focus one something other than home for a few hours a day. I get a break.
But still, I want to stay home.
Yesterday I stayed home and got a glimpse of what being a SAHM would be like. Peanut was whiney. He's in the throes of teething and didn't want me to put him down for any reason. He wanted to play, but I better be not more than an arm's length away. He whined between sucks on his bottle and that never happens. My children are food lovers.
The whining wears on your nerves eventually, especially when you have another baby that also needs attention.
|Not from yesterday, the Bambinos were not dressed this cute yesterday either.|
Halfway through my day I had a realization: I'd showered and blow dried my hair but didn't straighten it or put on makeup. I was wearing yoga pants and a huge oversized t-shirt. And then I thought, would I even bother if I stayed at home everyday?
You see, I always put on makeup before I leave the house. I grew up in a household where it was unacceptable to leave the house in sweats. I don't even own sweats; the closest I have is the yoga pants and even if I leave the house wearing them, I have makeup on.
I swore I would never be one of those people that quits getting dressed or "getting ready" every day. So far, with two babies my track record is pretty good. But then I took a good, hard look at myself.
I was being naive. There are just some days where I would not be able to get ready. Would B still love me or be attracted to me? As someone that does not feel good about herself unless she looks good, I always told myself I would always try and look my best -no matter what- but yet I finally understood what it meant to be a mother. I understand why women say they quit taking care of themselves and focus solely on their family.
I finally realized that sometimes, something's gotta give and if that's the sacrifice I'd be making in staying home with my babies, that would okay with me, it would have to be. Most of the time.
Disclaimer: I do not judge others for not getting ready every day, I just never thought I would ever give up getting ready every day. It's the way I was raised. I was not judging those that do not get ready every day so please don't get your panties in a bundle.