Monday, September 19, 2011

Mama Says: From Two to Four

Today's Mama Says Mama is Brittany from  From Two to Four. She's one of the first twin blogs I found and I love being able to keep up with her two adorable little ones!

Thanks to Lindsay for hosting me today! Heres a quick rundown of who I am: I am a mommy to boy/girl twins via IVF and born at 32 weeks who will be turning 16 months on September 13th. I started my blog because I am better at sitting at a computer then filling out a baby book.  Hubby and I will be celebrating 6 years of marriage on 11/11/11 this year!!  I work at my Father In Law's dental practice 3 days a week doing PR and marketing for the practice.  Hubby works in the Insurance industry.  We had a long road to parenthood and never take a day for granted because of this.  You can learn more about us at our blog From Two to Four.

When the twins were born I think I was on a mommy high, I went through each day that the twins were in the NICU holding everything together to the point that most were surprised at how well I was doing.  The first fews days were a blur of nurses and doctors telling us a hundred different things about each baby.  I was recovering from my double whammy (vaginal & c-section birth) and trying to be 100% there for each baby at every care, every diaper change and feed, I wanted them to know that mommy was there. 
You see those nice dark eyes (I NEEDED sleep)
I refused to relinquish any sort of control over anything that I thought I could do.  I thought that was what being a mom was about, I was supposed to be the ones to care for these babies, I was supposed to change their diapers, I was supposed to be there night and day to tell them how much I loved them and cared for them and how much I couldn't wait for them to come home.  My hubby and I would spend several hours in the NICU every day with the babies, we had nurses who had been NICU RN's for 20+ years tell us that they had never seen more dedicated parents and they loved seeing us with the babies.  I thought they were crazy how could a mother have a baby in the NICU and NOT BE THERE... 

After several days of trying to continue on my SuperMoMmy run I finally hit a wall and BIG.  HUGE.  YOUR GOING TO THE ER WALL.  I was dehydrated, had a UTI, was bleeding too much for where I should have been in my recovery and the doctors and nurses told me I needed to rest.  Rest, Rest, how was I supposed to rest I needed to be with MY babies.  Finally someone told me these words "You can't take care of your babies, unless you take care of yourself".  Suddenly it clicked, they were right, obviously I wasn't being a good mommy if I was exhausted and dehydrated (which was effecting my milk production), and fighting infection, I needed to rest and accept help where help was offered.  I FINALLY listened to my mom, my mother in law, my friends, and the nurses and accepted the fact that I needed to heal from what my body had gone through, if I needed to stay home from the NICU for a day so be it, but it didn't make me a bad mom.  
One of my happiest days!
This didn't stop at the NICU, I had to learn to let laundry sit there for an extra day (or two), I learned to eat whatever someone might have made us to help out so I didn't have to cook, I learned to enjoy my babies.  This poem really says it all.  

Babies Don’t Keep by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton
Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.
Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue, Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren’t his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.
The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs;
Dust go to sleep! I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

I know us moms tend to just go into superMOM mode, we are supposed to handle our children, a husband or significant other, our homes, our jobs, our pets, and our daily tasks with a certain poise.  This balancing act has become my biggest challenge of motherhood.  Some days I feel like a freaking ROCKSTAR, like when I have managed to keep both children alive and done laundry and have a warm meal ready at 6 pm, other days I feel like I could just curl up in bed and sleep for hours on end because I am exhausted from being a rockstar.  My babies are healthy and happy and my house is "semi" clean and I am happy and well thats really all that matters in my book!

Such great advice, Brittany! I think all new mom's juggle with balancing everything. I know I do.

If you'd like to be a Mama Says Mama, just let me know in the comments below!

2 comments:

  1. i love reading her blog! :)

    i'd love to do this too!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love the advice about learning to let laundry sit ....I already know I'll have trouble doing that! :)

    ReplyDelete

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